I love you, but I love me more

I recently parted ways with my on again-off again boyfriend. We decided that we didn't want the same things and that we didn't have the same passion that there was years ago. At first I was angry, then I was sad. Needless to say, my life changed so drastically in such a short period of time. He broke up with me on March 12th, I moved into my new place on March 17th. 5days. Nothing will be the same. again.

I had to frantically pack my belongings and move out of the house. I had to say goodbye to my furry best friends, a vehicle, and all house necessities. I couldn't really bring anything other than things that were solely mine. It was something very hard for me to swallow.

This man, who has been my best friend for years, and who I've know for my entire adult life is gone. I feel as though something is missing, it pains my heart. Not to sound cliche, this is for the best.

Last night was the first night that I slept in my own place. It was quiet and all I could think about was our relationship and all of the hurt. I had known for awhile that we were drifting apart. I was trying my hardest to hold on to our relationship, the last thing I wanted to do was let it die.

He gave me a mental bookmark for when I look back. How many moments in life can you point out and say "that's when it all changed"? I now have one.

Since I was with him for so long, I feel like I need to regain my identity. I'm going to take the time to heal, love my self, and become a confident woman. He may have hurt me, but I am thankful that he gave me a second chance at a happier life. I now know what I do and don't want in a man, and I know what I deserve.

There is no doubt that there will always be a place for him in my heart. Like my favorite quote from Samantha on Sex in the City "I love you, but I love me more".

I know everything is going to be okay. I just have to keep reminding myself.