It's Not Me, It's You: 10 tips from yours truly.

I'm probably not the best person to give advice to someone who is currently going through a break up, especially since I'm still in the throes of mine, but I'm going to tell you what is working for me. Here's my advice to anyone who has been in a relationship and is now "single".

1. Delete delete delete:

Go through your laptop/computer, phone, Facebook, and emails and delete EVERYTHING. My ex was deployed for about 2 years of our relationship, and we sent back and fourth *thousands* of emails. I deleted them from my "boyfriend" folder and my sent box. I deleted his text messages, his voice mails, and any trace of him. Do this step once you're ready. I did this week 3 into my break up. I made a lot of friends when we dated. However, most of them were his co-workers or the wife of a co-worker. Once we broke up, I broke up with them too. It's sad, but it's not fair to put them in an awkward position. There are a few girls he works with that I'll miss, but it's not something that was fair to put anyone in the middle.

2. The drunken text message:

You should not only delete your ex from your virtual world, but from your phone contact list as well. You don't want to start to text the first three letters of their name and then their contact info comes up and they wake up to a pathetic/lame misspelled message from you. You'll forget their number soon enough. Or... try my next tip.

3. Boo! Ghosting 101:

My ex is the Storm Shadow equivalent in the mind ninja arena. He knows which buttons to press to make me sad or angry. It's the type of button that he knows will simmer in my head until I go all Miranda Lambert and want to burn everything he owns. I find that people like this are toxic. After we broke up, I mistakenly didn't block him from calling me. If your ex is known for pushing your buttons or being a mind-ninja. It's time to ghost him/her. Ghosting simply means that they have no way of getting in contact with you and you don't inform them that you are blocking them.

Block your ex from everything. I touched all of the basis: Facebook, Text Messaging, Email, Instagram. When I was in DELETE, DELETE, DELETE mode I blocked him at the same time.

I have AT&T and I signed up for smart-limits which allows me to block numbers. If you don't have this option, you could change your telephone number so an ex can't contact you.

4. Me, myself, and my sanity:

If you find out that you ex has already moved on to someone new, block him/her too. I have had crazy new girlfriends contact me. The first time my ex and I broke up (2009), his new "girl" non-stop contacted me. This time when we officially broke up, forever. I moved out, and he instantly moved a girl back in. Come to find out, she was *Facebook stalking me*. winner, winner. Block the new person so you aren't contacted, make your Facebook where only friends can message you. Even if you are intrigued to do a little Facebook stalking, it's not worth it.

5. Make a list:

If you have mascara running down your face and you think of all of the good things about your horrible ex (like I did) make a list of how shitty he/she was and how it made you feel. When your ex reaches out to you to contact you and there's a slight chance of hope to rekindle..don't do it. There is a reason why the relationship didn't last. Don't try to super glue your broken vase, there are too many missing pieces. They shouldn't be contacting you anyways, if you blocked them.


6: Wanna play a game of 21 questions?:

Many people will find out that you broke up and will want to ask 21 zillion questions. Don't talk about your break up to any ear that will listen. Really think who you want to confide in. Also, if these questions are crossing the line and you don't want to answer, simply tell the person. I told a lot of people "It's not something that I want to talk about, when I'm ready, I'll tell you". You don't have to ever tell them. Unless you want to. I just added the last part so I didn't make them feel bad.






7: Over and out:

You have to realize, it's time to move on. It's over. I'm 25, we dated on and off for 5 years. I've known him my entire adult life. We had some really horrible moments, but we've had many good ones as well. Take the time to heal and work on yourself. Were there things that he hated to do? Do them. Was there places he never wanted to go? Go there. Do what you want to do. Focus on YOU.

The "Let's keep in touch" or the horrible "Let's be friends" is a absolute no. Your ex is drug, you're in rehab. Pretend you're in a 6th grade DARE class. *say it with me children* JUST SAY "NO".

8: Judge Judy 101:

My ex owed me money and we also had purchased cars and pets together. I paid for many household items which I couldn't take (i.e. furniture). I could take him to court to fight it, but I decided that I didn't want to have any more contact with him. It wasn't worth it anymore. I didn't want an excuse to reach out to him. Is a few thousand dollars worth being insane for months on end? No. Is it worth arguing and fighting about little things? No. I decided to cut my losses and move on. Bringing a court action won't make us get back together. It won't solve things or resolve unanswered questions. It will make each other resentful. I learned the hard lesson of being dependent on someone else and the "make believe". It's not like you can take your ex to family court, possibly to small claims court--but where could you really go? There's not a People-who-can't-commit-but-they-play-house court.

The flip side: If you owe him/her. Just give it to them. It's not worth it. At least have it in writing that you mutually agree that you owe him/her nothing. You don't want to get sued. yikes.

9. Pretty, pretty princess:

I haven't gotten to do this step, but I'm excited to do so. Get a makeover! Shape your eye brows, cut your hair (I must remind myself: No bangs!!), get your hair highlighed, try a new makeup style, pick up some cute clothes, or sassy shoes. Feel good about yourself. It's a little shallow, but who cares?! You're looking after you now, and you like the new "you".

10. Family and Friends:

Sometimes being around people who actually love you, will help the healing process. After I was happy about my one month anniversary of being single, my kind-of Aunt said that I wasn't "single" but I was Independently Owned and Operated. My sister makes me laugh by putting funny memes on my Facebook wall, or she sends me funny texts when I get ready for work in the morning. My parents have been nice and supportive to me. I'm thankful for my family and friends who have been there with me.

And....a quick list of don'ts: Don't "blow up" his/her phone with text messages and calls, don't Facebook stalk, don't set their house on fire, or key their car, don't tattoo his face on your butt, or shave your head. It's a bad idea. Act like a lady (or gentleman) and pull yourself together.

Remember, have a great time!

Bye Bye Brassy-Locks!

One of the biggest challenges of being a chemical blonde, is brassiness. Usually a few weeks after a nice dye-job from your stylist, your blonde locks can start turning a yucky orange color.

Brassiness can result from the chemicals in the water, the type of dye used, and the type of shampoo/styling products that are used on your hair.

I was noticing on the 5th week that my hair would start to turn an orange color, even if I used the Paul Mitchell products. I started to google the cause and a resolution. It appears that my low-lights have been making my hair brassy. Some people suggested going to the salon and they can put a toner on the hair. I was looking at pricing in my area, and it was a little too high for me. Instead I would dye my hair again. Then I came upon purple shampoo. 

I have used purple shampoo in the past, but it was a lighter purple and made my roots darker and my hair turn a greenish tint. I was really apprehensive when it came to purple shampoo, I didn't think it would make such a difference in my hair, but it really did! I found a great product from Sally's Beauty supply, it was inexpensive, and had a rich royal purple color to it. The pricer brand is Clairol's Shimmer Lights Conditioning Shampoo. Also note, purple shampoo can also be referred to as violet shampoo. 

Now that I started to wash my hair with purple shampoo (once a week) I notice my highlights are more vivid and my low lights stand out. Before using purple shampoo, my hair looked all one color and it was turning an orange/yellow tint. 

For about 4 weeks, I have been using purple shampoo. I use the purple shampoo before my regular daily routine. I lather the shampoo in my hair and leave it on my hair for about 3-5 minutes. You'll want to use a nice conditioner after, because I feel like sometimes it can make my hair have major tangle issues.

If you're thinking, why purple? it's simple. If you look on a color wheel, you'll notice that on the opposite side of yellow/orange is a purple/violet color. In order to balance your hair, you'll use violet on top of yellow/orange. This theory applies to red skin, you can use a green primer. 

Royal Purple/Violet: From Sally's Beauty Supply

Try to get the darkest purple as possible, you'll notice a big difference in your hair. The darker the purple, the better the result. If you get John Frieda's purple shampoo, it's a lot lighter and may take a few uses before your hair isn't brassy.

Another tip is to not use this shampoo too often or keep it on too long. It may turn your hair a shade of purple. I stick to my once a week and it works for me. 

Try using purple shampoo before going to a professional to get it toned. You may be surprised on how much of a difference it can make on your hair in one use. 

Motivational Monday: ALL ABOUT YOU!

Today I caught myself day dreaming, looking out the window and seeing ant-sized people busily walking with a purpose. I always wonder what they're thinking, where they're going, and why are they in such a hurry.

I was thinking about my future and how excited I am for what's changing, I know that I have had a dark moment that has left me feeling--bleh.

I realized that once something great and significant happens, I'll forget all about the hard times. My life will change when I meet the person of my dreams, I have the job position that I want, and all my aspirations come true.

I have recently come to the the conclusion that YOU have to be happy with YOURSELF before you can with anyone else. I have heard it so many times before, but I never really thought about it or I gave a dramatic eye-roll. I have been really motivated lately do to what makes me happy. I have been doing yoga, working out, reading, shopping, and talking to a bunch of people who lift my spirits up and make me giggle.

I am motivated to become happy because for so long I was told that I wasn't. I was made to believe that I wasn't a happy person, I had someone who constantly told me that I was unhappy. That person was wrong. I am a happy person who loves to make others happy as well.

Yoga helps me push the negative thoughts out and breathe in the positive mind-set.

What can you do that makes you happy? To some people it's a cup of tea and a good book to others it's skydiving.
If you don't really know, think of times that you felt satisfied. I would suggest if you have a disorder, to not do things that would trigger a bad reaction or habit. Focus on long lasting things that promote happiness--such as Yoga.

In the past couple of weeks, focusing on myself and making myself happy has has been therapeutic. I was motivated by a few of my friends who talk about being happy and making "you" a priority. It's not selfish, it's healthy. But like anything else, it can be easily abused.

Make a list if you have to. Wake up tomorrow and say "I love you".

Drive It Like You Own It

When I moved out of my ex-boyfriend's house, he decided to keep the SUV, the Jeep, and the Car. Even though I pretty much own half of the SUV and the Jeep was a gift; I needed some wheels without a fight.

I needed something to get me around and that would be easy to pay for and that would be a good investment. I did my research and came up with the top three cars I wanted. It boiled down to price, price of insurance, and esthetics of the car. I wanted "affordable luxury", I had my eyes set on a Saab. I couldn't find anything wrong with the car online, it was a great and reliable car. Saab stopped making cars due to bankruptcy, but their parts department is still up and running.

I looked on Craig's List and searched for a Saab, two weeks later I stumbled upon one at a VW dealer close to my house. I called the dealer, spoke with a Sales Man, and made an appointment.

That day I requested a car loan and requested insurance quotes, I wanted to be positive I could afford a nice car--without breaking the bank and so I could have some wiggle room when it came to great shopping sprees and pampering. I was approved and continued to read up on my lovely, potential, Saab.

I went to the appointment and the salesman was waiting for me. He showed me the car and I loved it. I wasn't afraid to let him know, after all, that was the only car I requested to see.

When we were taking it out for a test drive he said "Drive it like you own it" after that I was hooked. After the test drive, and checking the speed and response of the great turbo, we went inside and talked about the specifics.

We went inside and started the negotiations. I stayed calm and I had a figure in my head that I wanted to be. I didn't want to pay over $18,500 which included tax, title, and license.

I made a really low offer ($14k) and asked to see the "CarFax", on the CarFax report, it will show how long they have had the car on their lot as well as essential information on any accidents or service. This one had been there for awhile, but not long. I argued that it had been there--taking up space and not a lot of people's first choice when going to a VW dealership is a Saab. The salesman and I negotiated, he had to go back and forth between his boss quite a few times. They finally came down to the number I wanted but I wanted to see my limit. I was able to have them remove and replace the window tint to my standards as well as replacing speaks (I didn't know their condition). They agreed and I ended up paying less than I wanted, SCORE.

I felt great that I purchased a car on my own, looked at it, and negotiated on a price. Most women ask for their fathers or significant others to accompany them to the dealer. I wasn't afraid to say no to their offers and I didn't give in, even if they tried to trick me a few times and if they were trying to be aggressive.

My advice is to stick to your price and what you feel comfortable with, don't let someone hassle you or talk you into something you don't want. A purchase like a car needs to have your 100% approval, or you won't be satisfied

I am very happy with the decision I made. I'm now the happy owner of a 2011 Saab 9-3.

Update

It's been about a week since I moved out of my ex-boyfriend's house and on to my own. It's been really hard. I miss the dogs, I miss him. Even though I've been around loved ones, I still feel alone. To me it feels like I'm forgetting something, that something is missing...

I know it's them. I miss cuddling with the doggies and laughing and funny stuff they do. Or when he'd come home and gossip with me about the stupid people that he works with.

During the week I did really well and I haven't really cried. Suddenly today, I was watching Netflix and I had this overwhelming grief and sadness. I just started to ball--out of the blue. The entire thing is just sad. I thought I was ready to move on, but maybe I'm not.

I know that I'll get through this and that I'll be my happy-go-lucky self once again. I tried to make the end of my weekend a little better by going to TJ Maxx. I purchased some great bath stuff and good smelly soaps that made me feel a little better. I just used my new sage soap and I smell...Ahhhhhmazing.

In regards to my blog, I've been going through a tough time and I haven't decided what I'm going to do yet. I have some great ideas, but I wanted to decide what direction I should take with this blog. If I should start a completely new one or just keep this one running. I do have about 400 followers. I promise to all that are reading this, I'll crank out some posts shortly. I just need a few more days to decide exactly what I'm going to do. Stay tuned and I wish you every happiness.

I love you, but I love me more

I recently parted ways with my on again-off again boyfriend. We decided that we didn't want the same things and that we didn't have the same passion that there was years ago. At first I was angry, then I was sad. Needless to say, my life changed so drastically in such a short period of time. He broke up with me on March 12th, I moved into my new place on March 17th. 5days. Nothing will be the same. again.

I had to frantically pack my belongings and move out of the house. I had to say goodbye to my furry best friends, a vehicle, and all house necessities. I couldn't really bring anything other than things that were solely mine. It was something very hard for me to swallow.

This man, who has been my best friend for years, and who I've know for my entire adult life is gone. I feel as though something is missing, it pains my heart. Not to sound cliche, this is for the best.

Last night was the first night that I slept in my own place. It was quiet and all I could think about was our relationship and all of the hurt. I had known for awhile that we were drifting apart. I was trying my hardest to hold on to our relationship, the last thing I wanted to do was let it die.

He gave me a mental bookmark for when I look back. How many moments in life can you point out and say "that's when it all changed"? I now have one.

Since I was with him for so long, I feel like I need to regain my identity. I'm going to take the time to heal, love my self, and become a confident woman. He may have hurt me, but I am thankful that he gave me a second chance at a happier life. I now know what I do and don't want in a man, and I know what I deserve.

There is no doubt that there will always be a place for him in my heart. Like my favorite quote from Samantha on Sex in the City "I love you, but I love me more".

I know everything is going to be okay. I just have to keep reminding myself.

Monday Review: Murad Adult Acne Treatment

Three weeks ago, I got a facial at Massage Envy. They perform facials with Murad products, which I love, due to the quality. 

I recently turned 25 and I wanted an Acne Treatment as well as an Anti-Aging treatment. Before going to massage envy I had one set of acne products and one set of anti-aging. 

After my wonderful facial, she suggested the Adult Acne Treatment Line by Murad 

I do have do admit that I did have a little bit of sticker shock, but I have had it for almost a month and use it twice a day and I have hardly made a dent. I won't be surprised if the products last for 6 months. That would equal approximately $25.50 per month. 

first week: It was clearing up my old acne spots, but bringing more to the surface. 

second week: The old and new acne spots were clearing up.

third week: The old spots are gone, the "new" spots are almost gone, and my skin is clear and soft. No new spots are forming.

I'll continue to try the Murad, so far, I'm very happy :)

Saturday Adventures: Jeeping

What's black, slightly rusted, and hard to get in? The new Jeep!

On Saturday, we made our way to Ka'ena Point (North Shore Side), which was too amazing for words. I've been there before, but not all the way to the end, and I usually go to the Waianae side. 

When we finally got there, the waves were crashing and the wind was howling.

I even drove when we went offroading! (Only for a little bit).

Click for Jeep Pictures

Click for Ka'ena Point Pictures

Through the [Fat] Looking Glass

As new years resolutions are everywhere, "eat healthy" slogans are being advertised, and gyms/personal trainers are prostituting themselves, it's hard to not think about being healthy. Everyone has "health kick mode" in mind.

With that being said, lately I've been trying my best to really become healthy and have an athletic body type.

I'm trying to be fit. However, I'm not there yet due to underlying issues.

Everyone has a problem, however most people's problem's are hidden in a dark closet that no one can see. Alcoholism, compulsive shopping, gambling, and other various issues can be easily hidden. Weight, not so much. Overweight people have a problem that everyone else can see.

For as long as I can remember I've obsessed about how much I weigh and how I look. I have no clue why. I can't control it and it may always be a problem.  Yes, I have an eating disorder and yes, I've been seeking treatment for it. But the body image issues are still there. I'll lose weight and feel really good, until someone points out the elephant in the room.


A couple months ago, I was at my boyfriend's volunteer-thing and his former co-worker was talking about how her friend needed to make weight for their routine military weigh-ins. She was talking about how much her friend was eating X junk food and that the friend was going to have a problem with making weight. She turns towards me and said something along the lines of "there's nothing wrong with being overweight, but it's our job."

Okay... Thanks for the need to point that out to me...

I have no clue why someone needed to defend themselves after making a fat comment.

A few weeks ago my boyfriend had a house party. He invited a lot of his co-workers over and they ate, drank, and hung out. This guy came late and I was already outside with one of the guest's dog. Everyone was inside chatting away. After Mr.Fashionably-late and I stopped chatting, he went inside and made a comment "she's huge" referring to the pit-bull mix. No one realized he was commenting about the dog--they thought he was referring to me!  I was still outside and he quickly said that he was talking about the dog then someone said "Oh, I was about to say..."

Thanks. again.

Before I knew it hot, stinging tears ran down my face. I quietly and quickly wobbled walked away to gather myself.

When I went back to the party, I put my walls up and shut down.  I dawned fake smile and continued to look like I was having fun. The words kept replaying in my head like a sad song on repeat. I'm already socially awkward enough as it is.

This suit I'm in feels like I'm someone else. Yes, my currently body type feels like a costume. It isn't me, it's slightly scary and foreign. I have a soft belly, squishy thighs, and a big butt. I feel like I'm looking through someone else's eyes at myself. This really isn't me and who I am. When I catch a glimpse at myself, I know there is a streamlined Sarah somewhere in there, however she hasn't figured out a way to claw herself out. It's a hard thing to swallow. 

It makes me sad that people don't see the streamlined Sarah. They judge me on fat-suit Sarah. I want to rid myself of this emotional and physical baggage. I'm really this fun and caring person who loves fashion and anything with glitter.

This year my goal is whenever I look into the mirror I no longer hurt inside. I want to feel like the streamline version of myself. 

Let It Go

I think everyone can agree that there has been a detrimental occurrence in life that has made them cocoon theirselves in a big comfy blanket and cried.

**Since this is a public forum I'm leaving out names and places.**

I decided to forgive and try to forget all of the bad things that had happened. Of course we can always accept an apology from another person, but it's what's next that's important: actually forgiving.

I was at lunch with an attorney I work for and we were talking about the drama in our lives and then she asked about mine. I brought up a story of when I was younger, a guy who I was truly in love with (and dating) began dating someone else and ended up getting married to her. I cocooned myself and cried. Cried at the smallest things. I was heart broken.

It was awkward at first talking to him, I was at the receiving end of a call from him crying hours after they were married, he text messaged me after that, and ended up getting an annulment a week later (not because of me or anything I said, but it was an argument between them). A few months later he sat down with me and really apologized. I said "I forgive you". I was really, really angry at him.

Even though I said the words I forgive you I actually didn't. I still had so much built in anger. So much hurt. and so much sadness.

A few years later my wounds were healed and I forgave him. It took a lot of tears and screaming but I FINALLY was able to think about the hurt without crying or getting angry. I was able to move on.

My supervisor was surprised, to say the least, when finding out that I eventually forgave him. At first she didn't understand. It wasn't a fake forgive, it was a real one. I've moved on, I don't think about it anymore unless someone brings it up.

Many people accept apologies verbally, but not mentally or emotionally. I don't think it's fair to say "I forgive you" without actually forgiving them within yourself. If you end up getting back together as friends or romantically, it's not fair to either one of you.

Letting go of the hurt has really helped my happiness. I am able to smile and laugh while we're in the same room, verses before I wanted to strangle him or I'd give him the evil eye anytime he looked my way.

I can wholeheartedly say that I'm happy that I've fully forgiven him.

2013--Happy New Year!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

Wow. 2012 was a real doozy. It was a roller coaster of emotions. I learned a lot and I'm looking forward to this new year.

I am one of those people who thinks that the new year is a fresh start. I don't do die hard resolutions but it reminds me that I need to sit down and think about goals for myself.

So, for all of you that think resolutions are a waste of time--don't call it a resolution. Call them "2013 Goals".


New years is a day that I can't help but think of the new year. Yes, it sounds like a captain obvious moment, but on a day like March 12th I won't think of goals. On June 3rd I won't have a designated time to think about potential accomplishments.  On October 19 I won't think of adventures I want to partake in.

Take the day to think about what YOU want and what will make YOU happy.

Allons-y!!

 As of November 30th I will be moving from the Downtown Honolulu area and moving to another city, Kapolei. I have really loved living in this apartment, however there were some things that were going downhill which gave me the extra push to move out.

There comes a point, when you have roommates, to decide whether or not its really worth living there. I noticed little things missing, such as: toilet paper (who steals toilet paper?!), my special KerActive shampoo, towels, food, etc. I also noticed someone was going into my room when I wasn't there. I didn't confront my roommate about it, or my landlord who also lives in the apartment with us, I just decided to watch my things closely. It's sad that someone would take something that belonged to someone else, but it happens. 

Any who, I am sad that I won't have access to a pool, jacuzzi, 24 hour gym, spa, and the convenience of living a whopping 7 minute walk from work--but I LOVE KAPOLEI. It's a new city on Oahu and it's very promising to be the next Downtown Honolulu. I like how its more quiet and things aren't so expensive as the downtown area. 

Tomorrow, Nov. 28th we get the keys to move in. I'm so excited! I spent the entire day packing my boyfriends house (apparently, he's a big baby sick) and I've already taken care of my apartment. I'm really happy.

The four months I lived at Capitol Place, I learned a lot about myself, my life, and what is really important to me. Before, I never did the day-to-day needs and I really never have been ALONE. I've always had my sister, family, or boyfriend there. I learned a lot about myself while being alone. I realized I need alone time to become relaxed so my brain isn't overworked. I'm so used to going above and beyond for everyone else, that I wasn't doing it for myself.

I really encourage anyone who is wanting to move out from their parents to their boyfriend's house to really slow down. Even though I was only on "my own" for four months, this time was very beneficial for me. It actually helped my relationship and I'm at a much better place before I moved into my apartment. It helped me learn more about me. It forced me to look at my wants and needs.

Now that I have this new outlook, I am excited for this new adventure, now that I know what I need for myself. As the tenth doctor would say, Allons-y!! 

Spy Level: Girlfriend

Sometimes we come across things that we aren't supposed to see; whether its an email, a text message, or some other form of documentation. Once we see these things by snooping or inadvertently coming across it, it can be hurtful. Is it ever good to read it or search for more? I know a lot of people look through their partner's phones to see if they are staying true to the relationship.

I was an assistant to a girl at a radio station I used to work for, I thought we were friends and she was very nice and sincere. One day she was out of the office and called me and asked if I could look for something in her sent box. That's when I accidentally saw where she had been talking about me to her then fiance. It was basically talking about my lack of intelligence and that I was a slow learner. Of course, I could never confront her on that because I accidentally saw it, however, I never respected her the same again. The accusations weren't true. I remember asking her a few days later if I needed to work on anything and how I was generally doing, no response was given to me. No constructive criticism. If anything, what she stated are actually my best qualities, considering I went from a newbie legal assistant to a paralegal in 8 short months. Shortly after coming across that email, I left and started working where I am currently employed.

I have never been one to snoop in other people's things. Its rude and I wouldn't want anyone to do it to me. Its not that I have nothing to hide, but I could have been venting or speaking out of context about something else--which could be highly misinterpreted.

In the past, I have come across my boyfriend talking to another girl. After my heart sank a little bit, I did decide to read the entire chain of emails. I was disheartened in what I saw but the key is to pick your battles. I didn't confront him about it, but I did keep her name in my memory bank to use if it did happen again.

After seeing what can sometimes not be forgotten, you have to choose what to do with the information you have. Psychotic rampage? Interrogation methods? I wouldn't do either of those, but I think it's good to see why your partner is talking badly about you, when the time is right.

If you see your partner talking to multiple people, I think drastic measures should be taken. Not psychotic ones, but maybe decide if the relationship is really what you want.

A lovely quote from the wall flower "we accept the love that we think we deserve".

I know that no one deserves to be second best or twenty-seventh best. You should be the best to someone and your special someone should be number one to you as well.

Don't be a door mat but remember to use the information you have wisely.

My November Favorites

I love finding inexpensive little gems. So far, for the month of November these are my favorites:

Paul Mitchell: Forever Blonde Shampoo $17

This purple metallic shampoo helps keep my hair frizz free and healthy. I use it every day and my hair, which was dramatically colored lighter is nice and silky smooth. It has the awesome KerActive protein that really helps keep your hair healthy.





TokyoMilk Perfume: Song in D Minor $36

I am not one to wear perfume. If I do I tend to stay with Versace or Michael Kors. After getting a massage at a boutique style salon, I picked up the tester and it instantly reminded me of my childhood in Japan. I picked up the bottle and happily paid the $36. I have been using it for 2 weeks and there isn't a dent in the bottle. This fragrance is White Orchid, Orange Flower, Gardenia, and Amber. It smells so light and fresh.








Essie Nail Polish in Merino Cool $6

I am addicted to nail polish, especially Essie brand because I love the names of the different colors and I like that it lasts longer than OPI. This color is perfect for November and matches all my clothes and is a lot more visually appealing verses my usual black polish.



Ghirardelli Dark Chocolate and Carmel Squares:

Oh my sweet-toothness! So yummy and satisfying, it helps when things are hectic at work. Definitely worth taking a break for. These make the holiday season so much better.  What's even better, I purchased them for $2.99 at Ross!














Leave a comment on what your favorite product is and I'll feature some of them next month! :)

Holiday Go To Outfit

The holidays are coming up and that means a lot of parties. I like having a go-to outfit that is super easy to wear and that doesn't take a lot of fuss. I don't have time to run to the dry cleaners or have the money to spend on a punch of outfits I'll only wear once. I was recently asked what I was planning on wearing for the holiday season for non-formal parties. For a party I recently went to, I wore a simple Bluish-Purple Dress, a collar necklace, a black jacket, black tights, and black wedges. I had fun with my make up and hair.

Dress: Target Brand, $24.99

Jacket Coverup: Macy's INC, $24.99

Shoes: Nine West, $55.00

Neckless: Forever21, $5.99
Tights: Hanes, $3.99

Hair: A Jersey amount of hair spray, along with anti-frizz serum and a 1 1/4'' curling iron.

Makeup: Virgin in the the original naked eye palette,  HD Forever liquid matte foundation, and a translucent finishing powder.

I didn't have to purchase anything expect for the tights, it doesn't get cold in Hawaii--only chilly (68 degrees lol). It's just other things that I incorporated and have never worn together before. I have been trying to save money, so instead of buying new dresses I am just going to keep revolving what I have. For each holiday party

I go to I'll mix up my neckless, hair style, and possibly my jacket (...hmmm maybe add a few metallic skinny belts). I am not a fan of black dresses, since everyone usually wears them--I like to stand out.

Have a fun holiday season with your outfits. Black is out and fun colors are in! Express yourself.

Sarah

My Favorite Products

  *Disclaimer: I am not sponsored by any of the below companies and I do not receive compensation of any kind regarding the below. These are my thoughts and opinions.

I received a request to talk about my beauty regime and what I use on a regular basis. Here is what I use.

Skin: I used to frequent the tanning salons when I was younger. When I did, I started to use Hempz lotion. This stuff is the best in my book. It makes my skin feel silky smooth. It is non-greasy or oily. I no longer tan, however I still buy this lotion. It's great for everyday use and I usually apply after I take a shower. They have different fragrances. This is not the same Hempz lotion that they sell at Walmart, I thought it was the same--until I brought it home. I usually purchase Hempz at tanning salons and some spas carry this as well. I have also seen it on Amazon and of course, you can purchase it at the Hempz website. It costs me about  for $15 and it lasts for about 2 months.

Eyes: When I thought money grew on trees, I used to purchase Dior Mascara at Sephora. I would go out with my (now former) friend, and my mascara would suddenly go missing *dramatic eye roll with no dior mascara*. The day after, I really needed mascara so I stopped into a drug store on the way to work and stumbled upon L'Oreal Paris Voluminous Million Lashes. It was about $7 and gave the same results as the Dior Mascara. I use waterproof black and I have been using it ever since. Usually two coats and my eye lashes are long and gorgeous.

Lips: A few posts ago, I wrote about my Too Faced, La Creme lip stick. I wear this everyday and apply only twice. It's a great product that I pick up at Sephora. It is $21.00, which is a little pricey for lipstick but I really love it. Per Sephora's Website: Indulge lips with luxurious color and super moisturizers including white lotus flower and power peptides. This rich formula comes in abundant shades in four essential color ranges: nudes, spices, pinks, and reds. Edited to only the most fashionable shades, it’s impossible to pick just one.

Teeth: Every 6 months I whiten my teeth with Crest Whitening Strips-Advanced Vivid. They work for me, I know a lot of other people don't like them. I usually wear the stips before taking a shower, washing my face, and getting ready for bed. They can be costly, however when I see them at my local drug store on sale, I purchase 2. On Walmart's website they are listed for $39.97, however I purchased 2 for $19.95 each when they were on sale. Just keep a look out. Remember to check the box to see if there is an expiration date.

Nails: I use Burt's Bees Lemon Butter Cuticle Cream, I have it in my purse at all times. I found this particular product at Walmart for about $3. I use it twice a day and I've had it for over a month. I usually apply it at work during down times. It's not waxy or has an overpowering smell.

Skin Care: Philosophy's Purity Made Simple helps my skin. My skin used to be very splotchy, dry, and full of blemishes. I received a sample of Purity and I loved it so much, I purchased it once my sample was finished.

Sephora sells this for $20 for 8oz. The 8 oz bottle has lasted me for about 4 months. It is a pH-balanced formula that dissolves dirt and makeup while deep cleaning pores.

Concealer: Laura Mercier: I use the SC3 since my skin has a very annoying tendency to turn pink. This can be purchased at Sephora for $30. I use it regularly and I've had this concealer for about 3 months now.

Per Sephora's Website: This versatile concealer contains a unique two-shade system: one to match the skin's depth of color and one to match the skin's undertone, making it possible for every woman to custom-blend her own perfect shade. The high level of pigment requires very little product to achieve perfect coverage.
 

Face Makeup: Later this week I will cover face makeup, I have a bunch of different stuff and will cover it there. Stay tuned!



Blog Entry Requests

Aloha. Bonjour. Konnichiwa. Hello!

I have been a little busy lately and haven’t had time to update as often as I’d like. I plan on updating this blog more often. My goal is at least Wednesdays and Saturdays.

I have received some requests to talk about certain topics from people who read this blog. If you ever have any requests, please comment in this blog. The comments are moderated and I don’t make them public. So other than you and I, no one will see the requests. You can definitely remain anonymous.

Enjoy :)

In Memory of Willard Moore

If you have been following me on Pinterest, you'd know that I've been really keen on Doctor Who. I am pinning everything into my wibbly wobbly timey wimey board. I love the Doctor and all of his companions (all, except Martha--really). It has really taught me a lot. It's one of those television shows that has everything for everyone.

I was watching the episode when the Doctor and Amy were with Vincent Van Gogh (spoilers!) and the Doctor said

“the way I see it, every life is a pile of good things & bad things. The good things don’t always soften the bad things, but, vice versa, the bad things don’t necessarily spoil the good things or make them unimportant”

The bad things in life don’t spoil the good things. I think that’s the disconnect with most people. I used to be able to hold a grudge against someone because of one bad thing that they did, and I forgot all of the good things that they did. Just because they did one bad thing, didn’t cancel out all of the good things.

On September 26^th my Grandfather passed away. First and foremost, I love my grandfather. I wanted to make that extremely clear before I start this.

My grandfather did a lot of very bad things to his family when it came to money and he lied often. His reputation was tarnished and that’s what he was known for. Circa 1995: I remember when our family lived in Houston, he picked up my sister and me and he told us that he was taking us to a Leann Rimes concert. Leann was very popular during that time. My sister and I were so excited; we had never been to a concert before. We got to where the “concert” was supposed to be and there wasn’t one. No people. No stage. No Leann Rimes. I remember him stopping and asking people about the concert. My sister and I were upset, we went back home and didn’t say anything. It was a fabricated lie. Looking back, I think he was trying to show his love for us, but in his reality. I have heard stories as well as witnessed the damaged he has caused, this was just one example.

When I first found out that he was ailing a few weeks ago, I tried to remember good things about him. It was honestly very hard. My “memory well” was poisoned with stories and experiences. Of course, I didn’t want him to be sick or die. I later found out that he was going to go into hospice. Like David Tenant and Matt Smith always urge in Doctor Who, every human life is important. The bad things in life don’t spoil the good. I sat down and made a list of all the wonderful things and memories, a few are:

1. The Fourth of July Parade with all of the family members.
2. He used to drive with his knees and my sister and I would giggle.
3. He would have a small refrigerator outside and it would be filled with Dr. Pepper.
4. He had a pool and my sister and I would play in it with him, Aunt Janet, Uncle Robert, and their dog.
5. When my family moved from Carlyle, IL to Houston, TX; I went with my grandpa via U-Haul. That’s when I formed my love of R&B. It took us a little over a day to get there.
6. One thanksgiving during my college years, he helped us prepare Thanksgiving dinner.
7. His love for BBC America, Sherlock Holmes, and Mysteries. He loved to read.
8. He had this waterbed and he would throw my sister and I on it like it was a trampoline.

These great things will not be spoiled by the bad things. I will learn from my grandfather’s mistakes. Yes, there were bad things and good things. I think he was a good person who was just lost along the way. I love my grandfather so much. Anyone that reads this and knew him, please remember: The bad things in life don’t spoil the good things.

In Memory of Willard Moore

  

My Lovely Sunday: Jewelry Organizing

 This past weekend I was organizing my closet. I finally got out all of the unnecessary junk (suit cases, rubbermaid containers, etc) and put it into the storage unit in the building I live in. I also wanted to find a way to organize my jewelry so I wear it more often. In the past all of my necklaces, bracelets, and earrings were in a disarray in clear fish tackle box. 

I had to go to Ross on sunday to see if they had any towels on sale, with no luck in the towel selection I stumbled upon the tie organizer. At first I thought I could use it for scarfs or belts, but when I came home and had no place to put my necklace. I decided to see if my things would fit on the tie jewelry organizer. 

Along the right side of the organizer, the black rubber bars lift up from the metal--this makes it easy to remove any item that you want. I am sure if you wanted to do this, you could decorate it. I liked how it looked at the end and didn't think I should add anything else.

The top row I placed my long/bulky necklaces along with bracelets and rings. As the rows go further down, I place the necklaces throughout the rubber bars. 

I have added this to the top row of my closet, right next to my clothes so when I'm picking out what I'm going to wear I can pick out my accessories at the same time. 

I do keep my earrings in the tackle boxes, I haven't figured out how I'm going to display those. However, I'm sure I'll find a creative way.

Gotta Love SEPHORA

I'm waiting to go out with my friend and I decided to write in my blog since I haven't for awhile, it's been hectic and I'm sure I'll explain later once I wrap my head around everything.I finally fixed my make up, it's below. I'm seeing spots a little from the bathroom light shining in my eyes.

Recently I went from really beautiful blonde to a better blondish color that was better for my skin. I really like it. While switching hair color I noticed that my make-up wasn't matching... so, I purchased a few things from Sephora. I just took this picture and it's dark out, but it's a beautiful dark blonde with no highlights and sublet low lights.

Close-ups may make hair shorter than it appears :)

Yes, I know my eyebrows are untamed and unruly...but I like them.

IN OBSERVANCE OF LABOR DAY, EVERYONE MUST SHOP.

The other day I was in Microsoft Word and I thought to myself Does anyone play around with the designed fonts anymore?.... nah... Apparently, My work building does!

During the lovely holiday, I went to Sephora and did a little damage. It doesn't look like much but this is what I got. Links are included.

From left to right:

Too Faced Tented Beauty Balm, Too Faced La Creme Lip Blam, Kate Somerville Exfolikate, and Kate Somerville Moisturizer

Kate Somerville has an amazing line filled with things that will make you 1) look youthful or 2) continue to look youthful. 

I don't have a picture of the moisturizer because it's currently in the bathroom with my roommate just darted into. Which makes me afraid to go inside after she's finished. However, it's very nice and silky on my skin. 

http://www.sephora.com/kate-somerville

In Naked Dolly

http://www.sephora.com/product/productDetail.jsp?skuId=1442342

I am usually not one to wear lipstick, lip gloss, let alone chap-stick  but I ADORE Naked Dolly. I think it's the perfect color and I don't have to apply it too often. I like that it's still sheer enough to see my actual lip color. 

So far the Beauty Balm is nice, I think mine is a little dark. I was expecting it to be like the silicone base pore corrector that Too Faced has, but it's not. I do like it though.